RBS, AFA, Home, Won 2-1
Team: Weeks, Stylianou, Oxley, N Seller, Whittaker, Bradshaw, Nuckey, Ricketts, King, Nelson, D Field. Sub – Curtis
Scorers: Nelson, Nuckey
Scribe: Ricketts
All week we had been looking forward to the last friendly of the season against Norseman. The game was intended to allow the team to try new faces, new formations and new strategies.

Oh how wrong could it be! Come Thursday, we were now to face Royal Bank of Scotland in the 1st round of the AFA Cup. The game was a home draw, so Bethune it was. So, just when the pre match preparation couldn’t get any worse, we then discover that the Bethune changing rooms had been vandalized. Getting changed on the side of the pitch probably wasn’t the best way to greet a bank team. However, this is EBOG’s – the home of ugly football!!! The warm up was a little sedated but the players were slowly getting fired up. The whistle went and off we flew. Surprising, we started strong and maintained a good hold of the game for the entire first half. We gave RBS little of the ball and I cannot recall them having a decent chance on goal. It was EBOG who looked far more dangerous and we created a number of chances throughout the first half.

The opener came through a good passing move. The ball was released to Fieldy who found himself in plenty of space down the left wing. He ran the line and whipped in a corking cross to the back post where Goals Nuckey had taken a position. Nuckey nodded the ball over the line unchallenged to put us 1-0 up. Shortly afterwards we got a deserved second goal. Weeks collected the ball and punted the ball down the pitch. The RBS defence couldn’t read it properly and Tommy Nelson latched on to the ball, tucking it nicely past the goalie. We led 2-0 at half-time but whilst we were dominating the game, we were still making silly mistakes. Despite a good, positive team talk, we never really got going for the second half. RBS applied more pressure and we found ourselves on the back foot. They still didn’t create many clear chances and we still managed to put in some good counter attacking moves. RBS got a goal through a dubious penalty decision and with 30 seconds to go, they could have taken the game into extra time.

Despite us not entirely controlling the second half, we did show good composure and a willingness to work hard. The back 4 were superb and resilient. All round, it was a good improvement on last weeks game and if we can continue perfecting our performances then we could be in for a rewarding season.

Old Owens, League, Away, Lost 1-5
Team: Weeks, Stylianou, Oxley, N Seller, R Barker, Bradshaw, Nuckey, Ricketts, King, Nelson, D Field. Sub – Bacon, Charkham, Van Gucci
Scorers: Bradshaw
Scribe: Ricketts
After a good first competitive win last week in the AFA Cup, a good result against Owens in the league this weekend would really get our season off and running.

The weather was lovely, the preparation was good and even ‘blue rinse’ Stringer was able to make it on his tricycle for the afternoon. The pre-match banter was positive and the EBOG’s 2’s were buzzing. Time for kickoff.

To say we were playing sexy football would be a lie. Instead, I will describe the football as partially attractive. When we had the ball, we made good progressive moves and there was good interaction between the players. When we did not have the ball, we looked a little lost and at times gave Owens a little too much respect. They had started the game harder and faster and it took us a while to come to terms with this.

There were chances being forged at either end. And it was EBOG who drew first blood when captain marvel crossed/scuffed a cross across the box where Backflip Bradshaw was waiting to pounce. He tucked the ball away before pulling off a series of backflips and pikes that would have earnt him 9.8 at the Olympics.

Owens did not hang about and continued to apply the pressure. This was rewarded when their striker ‘Chief’ scored the equalizer. Apparently, his full name is Hank Edward Chief. That’s Hank E Chief to his close mates.

Shortly afterwards, they were awarded a penalty. We did not clear the ball out of the box quick enough and our frustration lead to their player being hauled down. We were now 2-1 down and it was halftime.

I think I’ll leave it at that now. The final scoreline of 5-1 does not reflect our performance over the afternoon. It is disappointing that for the final 30 minutes it looked as if the team had given up entirely. Albeit, we had 4 injured players, used all 3 subs, Nick gave away his third penalty in 3 games and Richie Barker was getting hungry.

On a positive note, this season has started better than last years. We started that with a 5-0 loss away to West Wickham. Onwards and upwards then. Hopefully we’ll avoid relegation with less than 1 game to go! Only joking………no, actually I’m not!

Old Stationers, OBC, Home, Won 7-2
Team: Weeks, Stylianou, Oxley, N Seller, R Barker, Bradshaw, Nuckey, Ricketts, King, Nelson, D Field. Sub – Bacon, Charkham, Van Gucci
Scorers: A Carroll 5, Field, Oxley
Scribe: Ricketts
Well, what do I say? When Oxley gets on the team sheet, you know you’re on the verge of a glorious win. Although last time Oxley got a goal, we found ourselves 1-0 down! Hmmmm, not sure what my point is here. Stationers were very argumentative. Personally, I haven’t got time to have slagging matches with half the opposition. In fact, it got on my wick playing with Spenny last season that somehow uses every break in play to call someone a muppet. Well, today was like playing against 11 Spennies. Oh how my ears are still ringing.

This 1st round OBC game kicked off in good spirits. Stationers started very aggressive and made it clear quickly that they intended to use brute force for as long as was necessary to break the EBOG team down. It worked – they were up 1-0 after about 20 minutes. In fact, they could’ve been several more up if it hadn’t been for the impressive debutant in goal for the Bogs. We had started the game in exactly the same manner as the 5-1 thrashing at Owens had finished last week. Too much negativity, not enough talking, little to no confidence and, dare I say it, a severe lack of spirit. To make matters worse, the little warhorse Bacon was suffering from an irritable rib – serves him right from straying from his staple goujons. Mind you, by this point C3PO had more movement in his body than Bacon. It was at approximately 15.35 when the Ant Carroll’s show started. A lovely shimmy, a cheeky step over, lollipops was 2 for 1, and the shoreline read 1-1. Somehow Ant stuck the ball in the onion bag, which gave us a lift walking off at half time. Within 15 minutes of the restart, Ant completed his hatrick. The goals couldn’t have been better timed. All the pressure from the first half had subsided, the opposition looked beaten, we were moving well and confidence was on the up. Our superior fitness was now beginning to show and the game was there for the taking. Ant nabbed a further 2 goals, taking his tally to 5, but missing out on a sixth because of the fear of the resultant double jug!

The rout continued when Juuuuuulllllllleeeeesssss poked home a sixth from a well-taken free kick. The final goal came via a blistering run from Stylianou who ran the entire length of the pitch before crossing the ball to Fieldy who poked it home. Goals Nuckey put in another good display in centre midfield before deputising at right back for the injured C3PO. Goalkeeper Daryl put in an assured performance in his first appearance for the 2’s. Likewise, Rob Vellosa put in a terrier like display and gave back as good as he got – another welcome addition to Alan Drive. Man of the match goes to Ant for scoring 5, buying a jug. So, 2 wins from 3 and we are still in all the cups. A somewhat improved start from last year.

Old Challoners, AFA, Home, Won 3-2
Team: Weeks, Stylianou, Oxley, N Seller, R Barker, Bradshaw, Nuckey, Ricketts, King, Nelson, D Field. Sub – Bacon, Charkham, Van Gucci
Scorers: A Carroll 2, Williams C
Scribe: Ricketts
After a fantastic result last week in the old boy’s cup the 2’s were flying high with confidence after their 7 – 2 win. There was more good news for the team with the return of Nick Seller’s at the back!

We all arrived at Bethune Park and it was clear to see that everyone was up for a result against a team that had so far beaten Winchmore Hill in the last round of the cup, and were top of their league with 2 wins. The team talk was another special one from captain Ricketts and everyone was ready to go. The game commenced and you could see that we wanted to prove on the pitch that we were desperate for a win and good result, with everyone working hard on and off the ball. For the first ten minutes we played some attractive and effective football, keeping possession and getting behind their back four on numerous occasions. Subsequently because of this a host of chances fell our way and on any other given day we would have been up by 2 goals within the first ten, but it was not to be our day. The game started to even out but with about twenty minutes gone a great through ball was placed to the better Carroll after a slick move from midfield, and Carroll calmly chipped from the left corner of the 18 yard box to lob the keeper. Typical Carroll, has a bunch of easy chances but always has to be flash and score the wonder goal. The game then kicked off from the goal and you would have thought that our goal had already given us the win, because all of a sudden the entire midfield and defence suddenly forgot how to defend as a unit and the opposition started to get on top. As a result of our raged play one of their players ran from midfield and unleashed a shot from 25 yards that rocketed over the keeper and flew in the net. Maybe this was the kick up the backside that we needed because we suddenly flew back into life again. As like the first ten minutes we started to dominate the game again, creating chance after chance, but still we could not put the ball in the back of the net. The pressure finally told though and a great move down the right wing saw a final ball calmly placed back into the middle of the penalty area to Collin Williams. Collin coolly controlled the ball and hit a well-placed strike past the keeper. 2 -1 we were back in the lead, as we deserved to be. However just like the first goal we conceded the team decided that we did not need to defend as a unit and one of their strikers ran through the middle of midfield, through about 5 – 6 of our players and place the ball in the net. I was one of the players and it was a very very poor goal to concede that we should all learn from.

The half ended 2 all, but the team talk was still encouraging as overall we were playing some great football but knew that we had to cut out the stupid mistakes. The second half began and we came out flying, closing down their players the second they got the ball and not allowing them anytime to play. The pressure showed and just likes through most parts of the first half we totally dominated the play and created chance after chance. We should have scored at least 4 goals in the start of the second half but it still remained 2 all. This was the pattern of the half until and semi hopeful ball was played forward to Carroll…. and I know it’s hard to believe, worked hard to track the ball down and poke the ball past the keeper to give us our deserved lead. Then not long after kick off the ball was played through to one of their strikers and Seller’s, with his blinding pace ran back to make a heroic tackle in the box where he clearly won the ball. But just as in the past three games the ref saw differently and awarded a penalty. Fate decided to reward Seller’s honest hard work and the penalty was saved by a great effort from Darrell in goal. The game ended with a flurry of chances from the opposition who piled most of their players forward but we held on to win the game 3 – 2. A good win for the 2’s and a man of the match for Darrell the keeper who did not have a great deal to do but when he was called upon pulled of some stupendous saves. Well done lads, onwards and upwards. 2’s 2’s 2’s!!!

Carshalton, League, Away, Lost 1-3
Team: Weeks, Bacon, Langers 1, Bell, Chalky, Nuckey, Innes, Ricketts, Monkey, Whittaker, Nelson, Langers 2
Scorers: Ricketts T
Scribe: Chalky
The 2’s had started to get the season back on track with a couple of convincing wins in the cup and needed to transfer this form to the league for the long trip to Carlshalton. The team was much changed from the previous week due to unavailability and dropouts but Rickets re-shuffled the pack and called in Scott, Monkey and Whittaker from the 3s. Langers was back from having to run after Callow’s first touch in the 4’s and his twin brother said he had always wanted to go to Carshalton so he was in. Weeksy had stepped in between the sticks and he arrived on a speedboat from Miami. Dave Field, where do I start?

He did not realise that he had picked up Nick Finney’s kit bag last week when he left the club and only found out on Friday night when he went to get his lucky pants out of his footy bag for a big Friday night out. The pants were similar to his trusty old skants, so he thought he would have a closer inspection and put them over his head. He took one stiff of Finney’s pants and was unconscious until Midday on Saturday, Tommy Nelson went round in the morning to pick up Fieldy but he was out for the count, no answer at the door just a strange smell. Fieldy missed the meet time but at least he lived to tell the tale, be warned if Finney leaves his bag in the back of your car. With the help of Langers Tom Tom we got to Carlshalton in good time and found Innes befriending the locals with his SAL chatter and stories of the good old days. We had a good half hour to get our shooting boots on but unfortunately the fence behind the goal was not big enough to contain our shooting and the children’s climbing frame behind the fence was like a war zone with monkey harris’s shots raining in.

We made a very slow start in the game and found ourselves 2-0 within ten minutes, maybe it was the long journey but we had left ourselves a mountain to climb. For the rest of the 1st half we controlled the game spreading the ball left and right, the central midfielders of Ricketts, Innes and Nuckey the midfield anchor were influential and some of the passing was reminiscent of Japanese Olympic football team (Nuckey was told by his beautician that he should not play for four weeks due to a waxing injury but he played through the pain barrier and showed he has the true Ebogian spirit, not like Dave Field). 30 minutes in we made it 2-1, I can’t actually remember what happened but someone said that Ricketts scored after the match and it was a good goal? Half time we went in 2-1 down but we felt strong and knew that we had the talent to unlock any defence.

We totally dominated the second half and were camped in the oppo’s half but we were unable to get any proper shots on goal, we played nice football but could not turn it into goals. When you dominate a game and can’t score you normally get hit on the counter attack and we did 3-1 with what seemed to be a clearly offside goal.

Even the ref said at the end of the game that he had never seen such a one sided match and he was older than Roy Bertache! We did hit the crossbar late in the game when Chalky unleashed a overhead kick from 25 yards like Pele in escape to victory but when that did not go in we knew it was not our day! Our overall performance was good today, Weeksy did not have much to do but made a great save in the second half, Bakes and Langers gave us a great outlet from the back, Chalky and Scott won everything that came down the middle. The 3 in centre mid sprayed the ball around nicely, Monkey and Pete W on the wings ran tirelessly to support Nelson the lone man upfront, who led the line well and I agree with him that we should have gone more direct when we were chasing the game. Thanks to Langers the 2nd for his Ebog debut.

We can take the positives from this game and we will be back bigger and stronger than ever, 2’s 2’s 2’s!

Civil Service, League, Away, Won 3-1
Team: Weekes, Oxley, Seller N, Styllianou, Chalky, Innes, Ricketts ©, Vellosa, Williams C, Nelson, Dufour. Subs, Nuckey, Bacon
Scorers: Nelson, Innes, Chalky
Scribe: Innes
EBOG 2,s, with zero points from their 1st 2 league games, travelled to top of the table Civil Service with a certain amount of trepidation. The opening exchanges also caused minor concern as Civil kept the ball well and put us under some early pressure. We worked our way into the game however and as we adjusted to their 3,5,2 formation we became to apply pressure of our own with Williams and Vellosa looking dangerous down the wings. After 20 mins we made the break through with Tom Nelson doing what he does best, sliding the ball into the bottom corner.

We were playing some quality football now and soon doubled our lead. As a poor kick from their keeper arrowed towards Innes he was already calculating his next move. A deft control on the chest (not a hint of hand ball) brought the ball down and then without looking, relying purely on instinct, he sent the ball back on a perfect trajectory. 10 yards, 20, yards, 30 yards, 40 yards the ball soared and then dipped just beyond the flailing keeper and under the bar.

They managed to get 1 back before half time so we started the second half knowing we were in for a battle. Sure enough they put us under some decent immediate pressure however Oxley, Sellers and Stylianou defended stoutly. After 15 mins of the second half as Civil began to run out of ideas we just kept our shape and hit them consistently on the break. Mike Dufour was on great form, running to all corners and holding the ball up. We should really have killed the game off earlier than we did but eventually Chalky put us all out of our misery by firing into the top corner (the wand is back).

After this performance the 2’s should look forward to the rest of the season with a lot of confidence. 222222222222’s

Old Westminster Citz, OBC, Home, Won 3-1
Team: Johnson, Vellosa, Oxley, Van Gucci, Charkham, Williams C, Nuckey, Bacon, Seller N, Dixon, Ricketts T, Innes
Scorers: Oxley, Nuckey, Harris R
Scribe: Innes
Another great day at Bethune Park, which is turning into the 2 XI’s lucky pitch after 4 wins from 4 games. Not a great game in the way that our win last week against Civil Service was, but still a win and we progress to the next round of the OBC. We are being to build in confidence as a side, believing in each other and importantly believing we can win games. Selfconfidence is such an important thing at every level of football and we seem to be beginning to win this battle. We started well with an early goal from Oxley, which came from a corner. Rob scored the second again from a corner. 2 nil at half time, but still lots to do in the second half. We got stronger as the game went on and it was against the run of play that we conceded a goal following Oxley missing a header and Sellers making an impressive air kick. The next 20 minutes could have been tricky, but we continued to press for a third goal and in the end it came from a good strike from Nuckey.

If it was about dominance of the game, a couple of more goals would probably have been a fair reflection, but we finished 3-1 winners, which was enough. The second eleven are developing into a well organised quality team. We are working hard and from that hard work is coming some great victories. We will play much better teams than we did today, and we as a team will play much better, but on the day a win is what we needed, and we got it.

Norsemen, League, Away, Lost 3-6
Team:
Scorers: Harris R (2), Innes
Scribe: Nuckey
I haven’t been this disappointment and angry after a defeat since Rohan said those heart breaking words….”Jim, I have a girlfriend”. Sure it was hard to take and left a bitter taste in my mouth, but we are a great team and will bounce back from this set back and be stronger for it…………despite the hurt I’m feeling right now I know, like all rest I will see this one off too! And now to the game. On paper this fixture should not of caused us too many problems, coming into the game with 4 wins from our last 5 we arrived at Norseman full of confidence, but then captain Ricketts made the announcement that no player ever wants to hear - “Chaps we have had a late drop out and so currently only have 11 men, but don’t worry I’ve managed to get us an emergency sub” We all held our breath in anticipation, around the changing room a few murmurings of “oh god please not Patel” could be heard, but none of us expected what was to follow…. “Its Callow” There was a deadly silence of disbelief and utter shock, a few of the younger players tried to make light of the situation, but those of us who had been around for a few years knew only to well what this meant…..if we were to get an injury……. this game was over.

Each player had different methods of dealing with the terrible news in order to focus on the game at hand. Rob H and Collin listened to their Rap hipper’t’ hop music, Innes read lesbian poetry in his pants, Chalky played with his balloon and I just thought of Roy. Come kick off we were ready.

We started the game pretty well, our passing was crisp and our movement good. We were the better team in the opening 15 minutes, but whether it was the arrival of Callow on the sidelines or misplaced confidence that lead us to take our foot off the gas Norsemen were gradually starting to take control of the game and began to cause us a few problems. Half way through the 1st half Norsemen got their just rewards, a long ball over the top behind our defence was latched onto by their forward and not even Chalky with his blistering pace could get back to stop us going one nil down. This set back however seemed to give us the boost we needed to take the game to Norsemen, Rob H and Mikey were causing all sorts of problems in their defence carving out many a good goal scoring opportunity, plus we had 5 star Innes and it was he who levelled the game for us with a speculative effort from 20 yards which the keeper made a real hash of. 30 seconds later we were 2-1 up, great pressure from Mikey D put Rob H through who calmly rounded the hapless keeper and neatly slotted the ball into the back of the net.

Ebog were back on track and looking good, but then disaster struck and our worst fears became reality…we got an injury. Rob V strained his calf muscle and was forced off with 10 minutes of the first half remaining and on came Callow to save the day. At this point jokes aside I must say Adam did us a real favour and all of the team are genuinely grateful to him for coming along and he certainly didn’t let anyone down with the rather surprising performance he put in. If it wasn’t for you Callow we could have been on the receiving end of a real beating, well actually we were….we lost 6-3 and though some may point to the fact that we were leading 2-1 when Callow came on I for one lay no blame at his feet…for I blame Chalky who’s man scored 4 of the 6 goals!!!! Just kidding Chalks, the second half was a poor team display with a disastrous 20-minute spell, which saw us concede 5 goals. The less said about the second half the better really, but Rob H did score a cracker of free kick.

Heads up boys we right that second half off as a one off and move on, there is a lot of talent throughout this team and I have no doubts we will bounce back from this next week, plus we can all sleep easy until then knowing that Callow will be back in the 4’s.

Alleyn Old Boys, OBC, Away, Won 7-1
Team:
Scorers: Dixon, Dufour 2, Innes 2, Bradshaw 2
Scribe: Ricketts
After a second week of dealing with drop outs, I was on the verge of resigning from my successful post (!?) as Reserves Captain. But then a wave of inspiration came over me - why not call up Blue Rinse Stringer to fill the vacant position as 2nd team goalkeeper. Where have all our keepers gone? So in the end, we travelled to Alleyn's with a bare 11 and a old man as a goalie! The journey was potentially disasterous as we were ready to do the drive to Dulwich/Herne Hill. However, I was in charge of the route planning and through my superior knowledge of London, I was able to guide the 2 cars over the river and through Brixton without any problems and in a record breaking 75 minutes. They don't call me Tom Tom Tom for nothing! If Tolkein had asked me to guide Frodo to Mount Doom instead of that fat Samwise, then I would have cut the trilogy down to a much simpler 2 films.

Following 2 cup knockouts in 2 weeks, we really had to get it right today. The team was similar to last weeks so we were hoping to put in a much more settled performance. And, thankfully we did. We started very slow but gradually stepped up through the gears. We managed to apply a lot of pressure on to Alleyn’s, which was causing them to make mistakes. It was on 20 minutes when Ed Dixon chased down the defence who made another mistake and left Ed with just the goalkeeper to beat. Ed again charged the ball down with the keeper in front of him and the ball dribbled through to leave the goal at his mercy.

It must have been all of 5 miuntes later when a similar situation left Mike Dufour with only the keeper to beat. Again, Mike cooly slotted the ball home to make it 2-0. At this point, we were still not at full steam but the goals had knocked the momentum of the game back in our favour. Alleyn's seemed to be surprised at how quickly we had got into the game after a slow start. What was more impressive was that despite being 2 up, we still continued to lift one another and raise the tempo of our game. At this point, some of our moves were breath taking. There was good movement from all the players and we were making intelligent runs off and on the ball. These qualities were not evident in the past 2 games, which would explain why we were knocked out of the cups by, so called lesser teams.

With a few minutes left of the half, we put together a beautiful move, which started with chalky at the back, was played to Innes and Langers in midfield. Both forwards made space and played the ball neatly before Innes collected from a Dufour through ball, which left him with a one on one with the keeper. I was already waiting on the halfway line as I knew 5 star was never going to miss. 3-0 at half time and we all knew we still had plenty more to give. Typically we started the second half slow and Alleyn's deservedly got a goal back to take it to 3-1. We looked a little rattled but responded almost straight from the restart when Captain Marval slotted a ball through to Bradshaw who side footed past the keeper. The back flip master demonstrated his gymnastics as the scoreline now read 4-1. Alleyn's heads dropped and we knew we had done enough.

Unfortunately, one of their defenders had a moment to forget as he put in a very poor challenge on Ed Dixon. Ed had just sold him another dummy and as he turned, the defended ploughed straight through the back of him. In doing so Ed, went down with his leg still trapped between the defender and the ground. It was clear that Ed had either broken or badly fractured his leg. The ambulance was called and took around 40 minutes to get there. Ed remained composed whilst clearly being in a lot of discomfort and battled well against the cold and the pain that he was sufering from. The challenge itself was more clumsy than malicious but there was absolutely no need from it as Ed was on the halfway line. Ed had played a fantastic game to this point and was really beginning to settled in our team. We all hope that he gets better soon and can resume playing football in the near future. I would also like to thank all his team mates for their help and also to Alleyn's for organizing the ambulance. It was dealt with professionally.

So 50 minutes later and the game continued. Alleyn's took off their player who had injured Ed (he only got a yellow for it) as he was not in the right frame of mind to continue. They also agreed to playing out the game with 10 men as it was in line with the spirit of the Old Boys union. Despite this being a really kind gesture, I think they too only had 11 men anyway!!

We quickly got refocused on the game and got back to the job at hand. Alleyn's on the other hand barely looked like they wanted to play. We scored a further 3 goals but really should've scored another 10. The biggest culprit was Mike Dufour who had an open goal to score a hattrick but managed to put the ball 10 feet wide. We are all sure that he pulled the 'jug avoidance' tactic here. Nonetheless, Mike, Bradshaw and Innes all got a brace with Ed netting the other. Final score 7- 1. We are now in the semi finals of the Old Boys Cup – EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOGGGGGGGGGGGG

We popped in to see Ed at the Kings College hospital. He was high on morphine at the time and was clearly more settled. The extent of the damage was unclear at this point but he was more comfortable and still wanted to know about how the game had finished. A true legend in the making. Even with his broken leg I still reckon he'd do more running than Langers and Chalky!

HSBC, League, Away, Lost 2-5
Team: Weeks, Bell, Oxley, Bacon, Charkham, Bradshaw, Langdale, Ricketts, Field, Goran, Whitaker.
Scorers: Field (2_
Scribe: Ricketts
An away game at HSBC is not the most convenient game to go to and play, especially when a win is most needed. Nonetheless, a bare 11 made the journey via train across London to New Beckingham. I won’t drivel on too much, so to keep things short, we lost 5-2. We went a goal up after 5 minutes when Captain fantastic put a glorious through ball to Dave Field who neatly chipped the keeper from 25 yards. By half time, we were 2-1 down as HSBC upped the pressure and they got their reward with 2 well taken goals.
20 minutes into the second half and we were 5-1 down. We had stopped playing our game and allowed HSBC to run things. We stopped defending as a team and made it far too easy for our opposition to run pass us. Wave after wave of attacking play confronted us and we suffered badly. Dave Field scored a good second goal too, which finally gets him off the mark for the season.
There were some positives to take from the game. We did put in some very good attacking moves, and we raised our game when we were 5-1 down rather than completely giving up. There were a few new faces in the team too which takes time before a team is truly settled. However, it is the negatives that we have to learn from, and in particular, we must defend as a unit of 11 players. To do this we must communicate with each other, stand up against our man and try not to put in rash challenges. Anyway, that’s enough of that. Putting the 90 minutes of footie aside, it was a good day out. Bacon turned up last at the station which meant it was his job to carry the kit. From this point on, it was a train journey of ridiculing one another and anyone else who came into the conversation.
We held an interesting conversation about various EBOG tours involving naked men and “Singing in the rain”. It was at this point that we discovered that Chalky liked to play with himself a little prior to the ritual strip in order to appear a little more endowed. This would then present any onlookers with the simple question of “Is that his pe**s or an oversized cl****s?”. This was the main point of debate for the whole journey in fact. We bumped into Alan Shearer at Kings Cross and asked if he wanted to be a sub. We took his silence as a ‘no’. Never mind. He probably would’ve got on for 15 minutes but he obviously hasn’t got the right attitude anyway to represent the mighty EBOG’s.
We met Goran at London Bridge and on time. We all grabbed some grub and I told Goran to check that he could use his oyster card to get onto the train. Off he went and 5 minutes later returned and confirmed that he was able too. So after our grub, we all plodded through the terminal and boarded the train, only to find that we left Goran behind who had been stopped at the gate as his oyster card couldn’t be used. What a donut! I blame the language barrier.
All the boys stayed behind at HSBC after the game and had a few beers. We then got back on the train to London Bridge. The return journey gave us an interesting insight into the size of Scott Bell’s bladder. We concluded that it must be comparable in size to that of a rat. Scott literally stopped at every opportunity to go and relieve himself. Next week, he’s wearing a nappy to help this issue.
We had another beer at London Bridge, where Scott went for his 5th wee, and then departed for Kings Cross. Before getting on the overland to New Barnet, Scott peed again. Chalky also left to meet his girlfriend at St Albans. Oxley raised the question “does she live in St Albans then?” The rest of us where still puzzled that Chalky allegedly has a girlfriend. Has anyone seen her?
We eventually got back to New Barnet where Scott drove us back to the club. He did stop to wee up a driveway though. The club was still lively with the Race Night planned. I bought Scott a drink as a thank you but it went warm, as he had to go to the loo one more time.
So, a thoroughly enjoyable day with 90 minutes of bad football in the middle. Not too bad I suppose. Thanks to all the players for making the long journey south and socializing afterwards.

Old Actonians, League, Away, Won 2-1
Team: H. Ricketts, Stringer, Chalkham, Bacon, P. Harris, T. Ricketts, Innes, Vellosa, C. Williams, Nelson, D. Field, Langdale
Scorers: Field, Nelson
Scribe: Ricketts H
We arrived at Actonians well in time and well aware that anything less than a win would not be accepted. However, we knew we would always have the 12th man when we realised the referee had already had a dinner date with Captain Crap and his Technicolour Dreamcoat the previous week. We started brightly showing class that only the mighty QPR had been showing in recent weeks, very rarely giving the opposition a chance. Good solid work by the back five kept the shoreline minimal, and it was unlucky that we hadn’t scored as their keeper smartly saved efforts by Fieldy and Colin. It was 5 minutes before half time that our dominance paid off when lovely interplay between Dave “Dungaree” Field and T. Ricketts led to Nelson finishing at top quality. I did note that Ricketts did “close his eyes, drew back his right foot…aaahhhh, and it was not certain…aaahhhh, if it was a pass” that led to Nelsons finish.
So at half time we were leading 1 nil but really should have had more. We kicked-off the second half relatively slow, and paid the consequences when Actonians equalised, despite their striker being offside…I think. However, 2 minutes later, some great work from hillbilly Fieldy led to EBOGs regaining their lead with a superb chip that left the keeper stranded. We then defended exceptionally, and despite Stringer deciding to go on a surge forward (which later led to him being structured off with a nosebleed), we were fairly solid. It was not until the later stages of the game that we realised how well the ref’s dinner date with Joseph and his Technicolour Dreamcoat (aka Richard O’Brien, Billy Zane, Bungle from Rainbow, Antione Sibierski) went, as we were awarded a numerous amount of free kicks and offside decisions that enabled us to secure our win. The win was topped of with Rowan’s version of “Don’t Cry For Me Argentina”, which funny enough is the only lyrics he actually knows to the song.

Winchmore Hill, League, Away, Lost 0-2
Team: Weeks, Oxley, H Ricketts, Langdale, bacon, T Ricketts, Innes, C Williams, Bradshaw, P Harris, Nelson, Vellosa.
Scorers:
Scribe:
We all rolled up to EBOG's ready to kick-off the New Year. There was no doubt that certain people had over indulged in the turkey over the festive period as they literally 'rolled up'. We had a difficult task ahead of us - an away game at Winchmore Hill. We had managed a deserved draw at home a few weeks back against them, so today gave us an opportunity to fight for all 3 points. The warm up was a little sluggish. After running back and forth across the pitch several times, many of the players were struggling for breath and looking for water. What true professionals!
So the game kicked off and both teams started brightly. Winchmore had the better of the first 20 minutes as they played with 3 in centre midfield. We pulled Langers into the middle to counteract this and we then looked a lot more settled. Both teams had several chances to take the lead. Nelson created a few good opportunities but the ball whistled past the post on each occasion. Rob Vellosa also found himself through on goal, only to be pulled back by the last man. Red card - no, yellow card - no. Nothing but a free kick. Winchmore then took the lead through possibly the softest attack of the game. It was a real kick in the teeth but we kept our shape and held out until halftime. The second half saw us control the majority of the game. We restricted Winchmore to maybe 1 or 2 chances of which they scored from one of them. This came on the 80th minute when we all thought that the breakthrough for us was going to happen at any moment.
That pretty much sealed the game, though there was still a bit of time for Nelson to do a bit of sparring with their number 07. This could've seen 2 red cards but both received a yellow. Despite the result, we performed extremely well against a consistently good Winchmore side. We remain 4th from bottom (which is better than last year) but with a few games in hand. If we can get a good little run together, I am sure we can rise to mid table and then start looking further ahead at the teams above us.

Nottsborough, League, Away, Drew 0-0
Team: Ricketts H, Oxley, Pearce, Harris P, Langdale, Vellosa, Ricketts T, Innes, Williams, Nelson, Defour, Bacon
Scorers:
Scribe: Nelson
After Harris surviving a vicious attack from a wolf at ebogs, a good journey with no traffic. We arrived in good spirits, family Ricketts arrived after with uncle Julian Ricketts at the wheel. The team talk was positive and we proceeded onto the pitch, The team talk was positive and we proceeded onto the pitch, Mike Defour typically late!! An even 1st half with not many chances created from either team. Harry Ricketts keeping Notts at bay with some fine goalkeeping. The best chance of the half falling to Nelson who put wide and narrowly missed with a sublime free kick. 0-0 at half time…..Tom Ricketts with another positive team talk apart from whinging about the 5 foot nothing guy in the middle beating him every time in the air.
The teams in the 2nd half seemed to cancel each other out with not much being created at either end. Langdale came off for Bacon, Ricketts and Rowen battled well in the middle with Pearce and uncle Julian staying strong at the back. Colin and Rob giving us much needed width. A fair result, a good battling performance to take us into next week’s semi. Well done lads….excpet Pete. Love Tom. Nominated for match report next week – Pete Harris

Old Wilsonians, League, Home, Won 3-0
Team: Weeks, Oxley, Pearce, P Harris, Langdale, Bacon, T Ricketts, Innes, C Williams, Jakobsson, D Field. Subs Bradshaw, Haycock.
Scorers: Field (2), Bacon
Scribe: Ricketts T
Languishing precariously above the relegation zone, we found ourselves facing Old Wilsonians at Alan Drive who are currently bottom of the league with only 4 points. This game was an absolute must winner. After a fantastic 0-0 draw against Nottsborough last week, the spirit was good within the team and we fancied our chances against Wilsonians. Anything but a win would pull us back into the doomed relegation zone and leave us with one hell of a battle which would run to the end of the season. The preparation was as fantastic as ever. Both 5 star Innes and Shrek Pearcey forgot their boots. Jules’ concentration was also distracted when he realized he’d left the engine of his tractor running.

Playing at home was somewhat of a novelty. It is the 26th January and this was only our 2nd game home. Despite the lack of league home games, we have played a number or cup games at home and to date we remain unbeaten. So the game kicked off and we found ourselves playing against 10 men Wilsonians. The ref also decided to bring his 12-yearold son along who ran one line as a linesman. What was that all about? To make matters worse, Monkey, Bacon and Bradshaw where all left a little unnerved as the 12 year old was several feet taller than them. This is always a problem when you are born a hobbit.

We won the toss, played with the wind behind us and took the lead after 15 minutes when Fieldy latched onto a through ball and superbly slotted it past the keeper. Shortly afterwards, a though ball was heading directly towards the goalie, but one of the many EBOG mud slits intervened and the ball bounced in a different direction. Their goalie flapped, got confused and Fieldy was again their to toe poke a second goal. We were 2 goals up but were not playing particularly well at all. Despite trying to fire the team up at half time, we barely got out of our negative frame of mind that we were in. Too often we lost simple challenges, gave the ball away cheaply and gifted the opposition with possession. Langers and Jakob were too busy blowing kisses to each other and at points Fieldy was more interested in the game on the top pitch than he was on ours! Nonetheless, the game was sealed when a tidy through ball was played to Frodo Bacon, heir to Bacondor, who delivered a controlled volley shot into the top right corner of the goal. The keeper barely moved, as the finish was so precise. This effectively killed off the game. We had a few scares before the final whistle, but the back 4 defended resiliently and Weeksy claimed everything that came through to him. The final 15 minutes was played out at a snail’s pace, which Jakob demonstrated further by not leaving the centre circle during this time.

The back 4 played superbly again today and we kept a second clean sheet on the trot. The performance was far from great and at points both teams played the game as if it was a local kick around in the park. However, 3 points was what was required and 3 points is what we drank too over our cheeky vimtos. Credit goes to the oppo who fought extremely well with only 10 men. Likewise, the ref was consistent and his 12-year-old boy who ran one line also performed extremely well. Next week is the long awaited semi final against Finchleians. Whilst our current form is great, the history between the clubs would suggest that this is not going to be a walk in the park. Bring it on. Bring it on. On our form we can approach any game knowing that we have every chance of getting the result we need. 2’s 2’s 2’s 2’s 2’s

Old Finchleians, OBC, Home, Lost 0-1
Team: H Ricketts, Oxley, Pearce, Langdale, Bacon, T Ricketts, Innes, Vellosa, Dufour, Jakobsson, D Field. Subs N Seller, C Williams
Scorers:
Scribe: Ricketts T
The thought of writing this report has made me feel sick all Sunday morning. Coupled with a hangover, I’m not in good form for this. Nonetheless, here we go. Everyone was almost on time for this early meet. Even Mike Dufour turned up with an hour to go. We have since discovered that Mike never knew that we actually put the goal posts up before the game. What was more impressive was seeing how quickly the team really can get changed when they are aware that the posts are already done! The pre match banter was all positive, everyone appeared to be in the right frame of mind and the preparation was almost professional. I am confident in saying that leading up to the whistle, we could not have improved upon how the day had gone.

And then it all went a bit wrong. Finchleians are struggling in a league below us, but they managed to raise their game and put out a very good account of themselves. We, on the other hand, did not turn up at all. I think that everyone was focused on the game and not distracted by the possibility of a cup final. I do not believe that anyone expected an easy game. I also think that most of the team tried to put in 100%. So the reality is that yesterday we simply were not good enough.

We could blame the pitch but that should have worked in our favour as we are used to it. We cannot blame the ref who, despite showing a few quick yellows, had a good game in charge. The team selected was as good as any on paper that I’ve had all year. Therefore, as a team, I believe we need to take collective responsibility for the performance. It was not good enough. By February, the team should have gelled and the little partnerships that form through the team should really be evident. Instead, we appeared to be going through the motions and we looked as if it was the first time we had played together. Our next game is against Actonians in the league who sit below us but only by a couple of points. This will be a must win game. I expect the players who are selected to raise their own performance and make up for yesterday’s aweful display. That includes myself who had a bad game as well. With so many players returning I’m sure that the team will vary next week. Therefore, it is hugely important that those who are selected put in 100% and demonstrate what they are capable of as I do not pick players based on reputation.

So, it’s the league campaign that we now focus on. Let’s put this game behind us and remain focused and positive so that we can pick up points in the league and get us nearer to the top which is where we should be. MOM – Harry. Kept us in the game and pulled off a number of 1 on 1 saves. Unfortunately, it has left a hole in my wallet!